awkward-bookworm: miakosamuio: I get so angry...

miakosamuio:

I get so angry that they deleted this because it’s such an important part of Dudley’s character - while he was jerk, the reason he was jerk wasn’t because he was simply a jerk, it was because of his upbringing and never learning what he was doing was wrong. He was a good person who didn’t know how to be good because he’d been spoilt and friends with the bullies all his life. He never saw the point in being nice because that was seen as being “weak”.

But then the dementors came, and he saw the worst thing, the thing that scared him more than anything: His true self. He saw what a bully he was and how pathetic he was, and how he didn’t have any true friends. And worse yet, Harry saved him - that surely would have made him feel worse. He’s seeing all the terrible things he’s done to Harry, and yet Harry still cares for him and he wishes he could be as good and as brave and decent and humble as Harry - but he didn’t know how.

He doesn’t know how to change, because he’s never been a “good guy” in his whole life. He’s always been tough and abusive and gets whatever he wants without having to think of other people because he didn’t realise how much he hurt them. But now he does, and he wants to change and make up for what he’s done to Harry, but he didn’t know how, so he left him a cup of tea outside his bedroom. Because he’s not good with words and feelings, and that was his way of saying he’s sorry for what he put Harry through.

And then here, it doesn’t seem like much to someone who hasn’t read the books - but all Harry’s life with the Dursleys as a waste of space - as less than nothing. Dudley used to treat everyone not in his gang as less than nothing, and for Dudley to say this - for him to acknowledge that Harry is a person show’s that he has come so far. He still has a long way to go, but the fact he is trying to make up for what he’s done shows that he’s developed and that his adulthood won’t be a guy who probably would have ended up in jail before he was twenty, but a guy who’ll perhaps become a champion boxer with a spouse and kids.

And then I think about how they managed to find time for Harry and Hermione dancing and not this and I want to set a lethifold on Yates.